Showing posts with label romantic deception. Show all posts
Showing posts with label romantic deception. Show all posts
Thursday, June 9, 2011
We've moved!
We're closing down this blog and moving over to our website at www.romanticdeception.com. You'll find our most recent blog posts there and information about the book, Romantic Deception: The Six Signs He's Lying, and upcoming and previous speaking engagements. We hope you'll stop by and check it out.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Dating Safety Tips for Women Over 40
It's no surprise that three out of eleven tips suggest conducting some background research on your date. At the very least Google the guy, then check out his Facebook, MySpace and Linkedin profiles. Dig as deep as you can go. It's amazing how much information you can gather without ever leaving the comfort of your home. I should know, I've made a career out of it.
Not comfortable with your own investigative skills? Then hire a private investigator. There's a group called Female Legal and Investigative Professionals (F.L.I.P.) with members across the country. To learn more, click here.
Not comfortable with your own investigative skills? Then hire a private investigator. There's a group called Female Legal and Investigative Professionals (F.L.I.P.) with members across the country. To learn more, click here.
Friday, March 18, 2011
Tips for finding long lost friends
The popular site Fab Over Fifty just published an article to help people find long lost friends (or lovers for that matter!). Darlene E. Adams, co-author of Romantic Deception: The Six Signs He's Lying, and owner of E-infoseek.com, offers her tips for free sites that can help anybody track someone down. Norma Tillman, author of How to Find Almost Anyone, also weighs in. Check it out!
Friday, March 4, 2011
Listen Live to Romantic Deception Authors on BlogTalkRadio
Tune in on Saturday, March 5, 2011 at 9:00 p.m. EST to listen as Dr. Sally Caldwell and Darlene E. Adams talk about their book Romantic Deception: The Six Signs He's Lying. The authors will be taking questions on BlogTalkRadio as they discuss important guidelines regarding what to look for to determine if the man you are involved with really is who he says he is.
To listen, just follow this link.
To listen, just follow this link.
Friday, February 4, 2011
National TV Show Seeks Victims for On-Camera Interviews
A national television show is seeking victims of online romantic deception for on-camera interviews. In particular, they are looking for women who were harmed by men they met through online dating services who they later found out had criminal records. If you are willing to share your story, please contact Kelly Rice at krice@kingworld.com.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
GPS Tracking in Cameras and Smartphones Useful in Determining Romantic Deception
We all know that lying on the Internet is prevalent. Anyone who's tried on-line dating knows that people aren't always what they claim to be. I've heard lots of stories – and experienced a few examples myself – of individuals who are much older, much heavier, and much less educated than their profiles portray.
When that deception pours over into everyday living inside a romantic relationship, then it's a real issue. There is a fine line between embellishing on a profile to make oneself more attractive, and out right lying about every aspect of one's life. As Dr. Caldwell, author of Romantic Deception: The Six Signs He's Lying defines it, it is the "unrestrained misrepresentation of significant facts in the context of a intimate relationship." In other words, someone who truly is an impostor.
Everyday I look for new ways to help victims uncover the truth about the romantic liars in their lives. Did you know that you can now determine exactly where a photograph was taken? There is a new technology built into all GPS enabled cameras and Smartphones that will give you the exact location, within 15 feet, of where the photo was snapped.
This technology can be very useful in determining whether your romantic partner is telling the truth – or not. To learn more, click here.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Romantic Deception now available in all ebook formats
We are pleased to announce that Romantic Deception: The Six Signs He's Lying is now available for download for the iPad from Apple's iBookstore. It's also now available for Amazon's Kindle, Barnes & Noble Nook, and Sony e-Reader.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Pathological Liars - Relationship Scam Artists
Written by HealthyPlace.com Staff Writer
The relationship scam artist is usually a pathological liar, a con artist, maybe a psychopath. Discover how to detect the lies and get out before it's too late. [more]
Saturday, May 24, 2008
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Proceed With Caution When Hiring a Private Investigator
Much of what I needed to know about my ex I was able to dig up on my own through online databases, but there was one nagging piece that I needed an answer to. Bob* told me he had never been married. The evidence supported that. I met many of his friends and his entire family. No one indicated that he'd been married before. But when he moved his numerous possessions out of my house the day the relationship ended, he left behind several items that raised suspicion.
These items were household goods, new, and still in the original boxes. He told me that he'd received one or more of the items as awards from golf tournaments. But these were household goods, not typical golf incentives: a cappuccino machine, hand mixer, juicer, dishes, glassware, about ten items in total. They looked a lot like wedding or shower gifts. I wondered if he had lied about his marital history as well as his financial situation.
So I asked a local PI to conduct a background check just to be sure. Weeks passed and my curiosity grew. One day I received an email from the PI asking me to call him regarding the investigation. Our conversation was shrouded in mystery. He told me he could not tell me everything he had found out, or how he had found the information, but he declared – in no uncertain terms – that Bob was currently married! I can't tell you what a shock that was to hear. We had ended the relationship just two months prior so I knew that the marriage was not a recent one. My mind raced with how he could possibly have hid a current marriage. I asked the PI for details but he refused to tell me more.
My mind reeled and my heart sank at the thought of this level of deception. I thought perhaps there had been a previous, brief marriage, but never did I imagine a current marriage. It took me about 24 hours to gain my composure and to put into action my own search for the truth. I emailed an associate of the PI who was involved in the initial search. I was able to pry a "possible" first name and age of the "wife" from the associate who relayed what he could remember. My next stop was the Registry of Vital Records where I met a sweet and helpful employee who performed a search of the marriage records for me. No marriage record turned up for Bob.
I spent innumerable hours online searching the name I was given. Nothing turned up that linked Bob to a potential wife. It took some time, and much angst, but I finally began to realize that the person the PI so adamantly claimed was his wife, was in fact his sister. This fact was later confirmed through another PI who, upon hearing my story, offered to conduct a database search for me.
The moral of this post is: Take every nugget you receive with a grain of salt. Not all information you, or a private investigator, pulls from a database is reliable. The PI who performed the initial search could have saved me much pain simply by qualifying his investigative results. Apparently he found a woman's name linked to the address Bob currently resided at (his parents' home). The woman's age was around Bob's age. The PI made a huge leap by assuming that it was a wife and not another relative.
Databases are subject to human error upon inputting data. Reports available on the Web from sources like peoplefinders.com and intellius.com, among others, offer very basic information and cost money to view. Much of the information they provide is available for free if you know where to look for it. The information on these reports is also not always current and in many cases inaccurate or unavailable. It cannot be relied upon. Beware that what they offer may not be available in your state. For example, usa-people-search.com offers a "Comprehensive Background Check" for $39.95 that includes marriage and divorce records. What you don't see is that in Massachusetts, marriage records are not available online, so you will not receive any marital information on someone you check in the state of Massachusetts.
I also have been told that intellius.com offers to provide a telephone number for $2.95. What they don't tell you is that the number may not be for the individual you are seeking. It could be any individual by the same name in that state. They also have a no refund policy. Buyer beware.
Bottom line: Hire a reputable private investigator. Investigate the investigator. Make sure he or she has credentials and is licensed if licensing is required in your state. Check references as well. Ask to see certified copies of marriage licenses before believing that the individual you are checking is truly married. Take information obtained from databases with a bit of skepticism.
* Name has been changed.
These items were household goods, new, and still in the original boxes. He told me that he'd received one or more of the items as awards from golf tournaments. But these were household goods, not typical golf incentives: a cappuccino machine, hand mixer, juicer, dishes, glassware, about ten items in total. They looked a lot like wedding or shower gifts. I wondered if he had lied about his marital history as well as his financial situation.
So I asked a local PI to conduct a background check just to be sure. Weeks passed and my curiosity grew. One day I received an email from the PI asking me to call him regarding the investigation. Our conversation was shrouded in mystery. He told me he could not tell me everything he had found out, or how he had found the information, but he declared – in no uncertain terms – that Bob was currently married! I can't tell you what a shock that was to hear. We had ended the relationship just two months prior so I knew that the marriage was not a recent one. My mind raced with how he could possibly have hid a current marriage. I asked the PI for details but he refused to tell me more.
My mind reeled and my heart sank at the thought of this level of deception. I thought perhaps there had been a previous, brief marriage, but never did I imagine a current marriage. It took me about 24 hours to gain my composure and to put into action my own search for the truth. I emailed an associate of the PI who was involved in the initial search. I was able to pry a "possible" first name and age of the "wife" from the associate who relayed what he could remember. My next stop was the Registry of Vital Records where I met a sweet and helpful employee who performed a search of the marriage records for me. No marriage record turned up for Bob.
I spent innumerable hours online searching the name I was given. Nothing turned up that linked Bob to a potential wife. It took some time, and much angst, but I finally began to realize that the person the PI so adamantly claimed was his wife, was in fact his sister. This fact was later confirmed through another PI who, upon hearing my story, offered to conduct a database search for me.
The moral of this post is: Take every nugget you receive with a grain of salt. Not all information you, or a private investigator, pulls from a database is reliable. The PI who performed the initial search could have saved me much pain simply by qualifying his investigative results. Apparently he found a woman's name linked to the address Bob currently resided at (his parents' home). The woman's age was around Bob's age. The PI made a huge leap by assuming that it was a wife and not another relative.
Databases are subject to human error upon inputting data. Reports available on the Web from sources like peoplefinders.com and intellius.com, among others, offer very basic information and cost money to view. Much of the information they provide is available for free if you know where to look for it. The information on these reports is also not always current and in many cases inaccurate or unavailable. It cannot be relied upon. Beware that what they offer may not be available in your state. For example, usa-people-search.com offers a "Comprehensive Background Check" for $39.95 that includes marriage and divorce records. What you don't see is that in Massachusetts, marriage records are not available online, so you will not receive any marital information on someone you check in the state of Massachusetts.
I also have been told that intellius.com offers to provide a telephone number for $2.95. What they don't tell you is that the number may not be for the individual you are seeking. It could be any individual by the same name in that state. They also have a no refund policy. Buyer beware.
Bottom line: Hire a reputable private investigator. Investigate the investigator. Make sure he or she has credentials and is licensed if licensing is required in your state. Check references as well. Ask to see certified copies of marriage licenses before believing that the individual you are checking is truly married. Take information obtained from databases with a bit of skepticism.
* Name has been changed.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Digging up Nuggets
As an innate detective and now a student of professional investigation, it is amazing the amount of information I was able to dig up on my ex simply by using the World Wide Web. Today I will share with you some of the sites I found that provided nuggets of information about my ex and uncovered some of the lies he told.
The first lie from Bob came even before we met in person. We met through an online dating site and emailed each other for a couple weeks before finally meeting. One of the first emails he sent said that he now lived in an apartment, but that he had previously owned a home which he sold to move closer to his job. He said that he had chosen to live in an apartment because he didn't want to deal with the maintenance required in owning a home. A public record search of deeds showed that he did own a home but he didn't sell it, it went to foreclosure. The reason he was living in an apartment was not so he could avoid home maintenance, it was because he had filed for bankruptcy and wouldn't be able to get a loan on a home. Check out www.masslandrecords.com for online searching.
A few days later he "remembered" he did own a home! He had forgotten when he wrote the last email! The reason he didn't remember was because he had just bought the house and it was income property. Wrong again. He did buy the house but a search of the deeds showed that he bought it from a close friend. Later, he admitted that even though the house was in his name, he didn't collect the rent on the property, pay the mortgage or the taxes, or do any of the maintenance. The friend took care of everything. A search on the friend at www.pipl.com turned up a government article stating that the friend, an attorney, had misappropriated funds for one of his clients, a child, and had lost his license to practice for three years. My guess is the friend was hiding assets but that I'll never know.
Another interesting piece to the puzzle turned up at www.archive.org. Bob said he had 50% ownership in a company he worked for. I was suspicious because the partner really put himself out there as the true owner. This website allows you to look at historical data on a website. That means that I can access their company website from previous years even though that site is no longer available on the web. I was able to see that as of December 2006, both men were listed on their website as "principals" with both photos side by side. But in January 2007 the site changed. The partner became President and CEO and Bob became Vice President of Sales. I put on my detective hat and surmise that they once were 50-50 partners but that must have changed in January 2007.
And one last site for now. You can also check out corporate ownership (and officers) through your state government site. Corporate filings are available, in the state of Massachusetts, at www.sec.state.ma.us. Just one more nugget to support my theory.
The first lie from Bob came even before we met in person. We met through an online dating site and emailed each other for a couple weeks before finally meeting. One of the first emails he sent said that he now lived in an apartment, but that he had previously owned a home which he sold to move closer to his job. He said that he had chosen to live in an apartment because he didn't want to deal with the maintenance required in owning a home. A public record search of deeds showed that he did own a home but he didn't sell it, it went to foreclosure. The reason he was living in an apartment was not so he could avoid home maintenance, it was because he had filed for bankruptcy and wouldn't be able to get a loan on a home. Check out www.masslandrecords.com for online searching.
A few days later he "remembered" he did own a home! He had forgotten when he wrote the last email! The reason he didn't remember was because he had just bought the house and it was income property. Wrong again. He did buy the house but a search of the deeds showed that he bought it from a close friend. Later, he admitted that even though the house was in his name, he didn't collect the rent on the property, pay the mortgage or the taxes, or do any of the maintenance. The friend took care of everything. A search on the friend at www.pipl.com turned up a government article stating that the friend, an attorney, had misappropriated funds for one of his clients, a child, and had lost his license to practice for three years. My guess is the friend was hiding assets but that I'll never know.
Another interesting piece to the puzzle turned up at www.archive.org. Bob said he had 50% ownership in a company he worked for. I was suspicious because the partner really put himself out there as the true owner. This website allows you to look at historical data on a website. That means that I can access their company website from previous years even though that site is no longer available on the web. I was able to see that as of December 2006, both men were listed on their website as "principals" with both photos side by side. But in January 2007 the site changed. The partner became President and CEO and Bob became Vice President of Sales. I put on my detective hat and surmise that they once were 50-50 partners but that must have changed in January 2007.
And one last site for now. You can also check out corporate ownership (and officers) through your state government site. Corporate filings are available, in the state of Massachusetts, at www.sec.state.ma.us. Just one more nugget to support my theory.
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